Pulcinella thinks Petunia is in love with him

From ”Det allra löjligaste” played by Teater Teatropen in 2003

Pulcinella enters and hears

Pet:         Aparte Wow! Wow!! Wow!!! The cooest… the handsomest… Did you see? He is sooo cool He is just sooo …and sooo stunning.

Pul:          Oh! Am I?

Pet:         …the most groovy guy on this planet.

Pul:          Asch!

Pet:         So strong and manley.

Pul:          Well…

Pet:         I am sooo in love with him!.

Pul:          Heheheh…

Pet:         Just think: if he is in love with me……

Pul:          I am!

Pet:         Wow! …and I’m just standing here…

Pul:          To Petunia …and I am standing here.

Pet:         Discusted And?… So what?

Pul:          You are standing there and I am here …

Pet:         So? Do you think I am blind or?

Pul:          No…

Pet:         I am standing here talking about the greatest love of my life …

Pul:          Yes, and now I am here.

Pet:         Listen, I don’t even know if my love is answered.

Pul:          It is!

Pet:         Is it?

Pul:          Yes, very much.

Pet:         Aparte Wow, the louse sort of knows Florindo somehow. To Pulcinella. Wow how cool! Then we can marry.

Pul:          Do you want that?

Pet:         Yes, of course.

Pul:          But after just one date?

Pet:         Hey! What do you think? Off course we shall marry, so we can make babies and all of that.

Pul:          Yes, yes, yes it will be great!

Pet:         But then it is Pantalone, my dad. He will probably don’t approve it.

Pul:          Why not?

Pet:         Because he don’t want me to marry a young, snub-nosed tenderfoot.

Pul:          There is no risk of that.

Pet:         Why not?

Pul:          If I just meet your dad I will asure him not to be afraid of any young little snubbydubby.

Pet:         Yees! Then we can marry anyway!

Pul:          Sure!

Pet:         So hey! What are you waiting for? Run away to daddy! Hurry up! Aparte. Yes! Now I can marry Florindo for real.

Pul:          Hurray! I just have to show myself for the old man and then I will marry Petunia.

Pet:         Hey! Stop now! What are you talking about? Goes towards Pulcinella.

Pul:          About when we are getting married – you and I. Just think about it the whole church filled with flowers and……

Pet:         It won’t be any of that you little repulsive creep!

Pul:          Aparte She called me her own little creep. To Petunia It doesn’t matter.

Pet:         What?

Pul:          Forget the flowers.

Pet:         Aparte. I can’t look at the beast. Hides her face in her hands. Get lost!

Pul:          Plays peekaboo. Peekaboo, here I am again, your own little creepiydeepy.

Pulcinella paws at Petunia.

Pet:         Get lost you warty baboon. Takes away his hand.

Pul:          Takes Petunias hand. Two souls and just one thought – two hearts that beats like one. But first a kiss.

Pet:         Petunia throws Pulcinella in a judo throw. Piss off I said. It won’t happen!

Pul:          Aparte Oh she is so chaste. No sex before we are married. So that is why she is so eager that I shall talk to Pantalone. To Petunia. Don’t be sad. I am back soon.

Pulcinella exits

Pet:       What a pussyfoot! Discusting! No sex appeal what so ever …and then I, best looking, snazziest princess girl – ever.  I’ll have Florindo beat the living shit out of that lowlife drooler. Yes! I just knew he was a nhero.

See also:
The Roots of all Wester Popular Comedy
Famous Commedia dell’Arte companies and their time

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