This monologue is not really a Scrolquio since it is tied to the plot in this particular play, Käbbel, that I wrote in 2019.
It was originally played in Swedish.
”Dott: In Oh see such a fetching audience! Just see, all this beautiful people who are just sitting here, – not reproducing.
But do something! It won’t be more of you if you are just sitting there.
Aha! You are shy. Then we do it this way: I’ll turn my back to you and then you will make babies. OK? Are you ready? …now! Turns around.
Wow, wow, wow! Here we go! So, come on! Work harder! Ad. lib.
Turns back. So? Are you pregnant now? Are you pregnant? No? Peculiar. But you must be pregnant? Not? How odd? Well you must… oh no, maybe not with him… But you are definitely pregnant. Oh I see. I’m awfully sorry. Ad. lib.
What is the matter with you? Don’t you have any hormones? Is it that difficult? Haven’t you have had sex education in school?
You do it this way: Reads in his book First the man takes the woman and…
Aha! It is supposed to be two persons. Well, that makes it a bit more complicated.
Reads more “And then they…” Oh no… but… Hihihihih….. What are they doing…. Ohh!
So this is what you were about to do in a public place? Shame on you! You perverts! This is a decent theatre/school/square!
I will have to invent a fertility elixir. Where is my assistant? Zanni!”
See also:
Commercialism in Commedia dell’Arte
A Commedia dell’Arte chronology
Sexfiaskon och en stol (sex/six-failures and a chair)